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(Classified) Bill Defends Against Flesh-Eating (Classified) Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 106 seconds Rep. John Haller (R-PA) introduces a bill that will allocate (classified) dollars over the next (classified) years to fight flesh-eating (classified). More coverage at: http://www.onion.com |
![The Onion: Supreme Court: Death Penalty Is \](http://img.youtube.com/vi/Hyph_DZa_GQ/2.jpg "The Onion: Supreme Court: Death Penalty Is \") |
The Onion: Supreme Court: Death Penalty Is 'Totally Badass' Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 182 seconds Despite arguments against capital punishment, the Justices overwhelmingly approved its use, especially if they get to participate in some executions. |
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The Onion: 12-Year-Old Boy Scouts Offer To Give Breast Exams Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 178 seconds Two prospective Eagle Scouts explain how they are preventing breast cancer by helping women examine their breasts. |
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The Onion: Pretend You Give A Shit About The Election Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 180 seconds Our morning show's political correspondent offers tips on how you can seem informed about politics without picking up a single newspaper. |
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The Onion: Disney Geneticists Debut New Child Stars Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 161 seconds Disney claims its latest batch of child stars is so lifelike, youll barely be able to tell they have no souls. |
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The Onion: Diebold Accidentally Leaks Results Of 08 Election Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 164 seconds Embarrassed Diebold officials apologized after one of their electronic voting machines prematurely revealed the winner of our upcoming sham election. More coverage at: http://onion.com |
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YouTube Contest Challenges Users To Make A 'Good' Video Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 152 seconds YouTube is offering a cash prize to the first user to upload a video with a shred of originality or artistic merit. |
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Warcraft Sequel Lets You Play A Character Playing Warcraft Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 179 seconds World Of World Of Warcraft's amazing level of detail makes players feel like they are actually in a cramped, dark apartment playing World Of Warcraft. More coverage at: http://onion.com |
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Voting Machines Elect One Of Their Own As President Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 195 seconds Voting machine DRE700 came out of nowhere to defeat Barack Obama and John McCain and become the first machine president. |
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In The Know: Has Halloween Become Overcommercialized? Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 198 seconds Panelists discuss whether Halloween candy and costumes have distracted us from placating demons to ensure a bountiful harvest. |
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Attractive Girls Union Refuses To Talk With Mike Greenman Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 225 seconds At a press conference today, the AGU announced it will not even acknowledge Mike Greenman until he begins dressing better and loses some weight. |